Having words with God

You alone can create such beauty! Why do you continue to be silent in answering my prayers for healing? I go in to have a mole checked on my back and the Doctor says,"it is fine but....." this one on your arm I can biopsy and burn. The pre-cancer on your face needs to be treated and I will biopsy the skin near your eyebrows".

WHAT?????!!!!!! Wait, I came in about my back!

If you have many health issues and deal with anxiety an unexpected issue can throw you in to a spin. I felt myself floating above my body as I was signing papers and being injected with lidocaine. The smell of burning flesh is nauseating. My mind is full speed with what ifing. Something is said about going to the ENT docs to have the removal of the spot in the center of my face, like a bullseye. I recall something called MOHS from when I had the Basal cell on my shoulder. I tell her I will get back to her and leave with a bandaid and wounded wings like when a bird trys to escape the cage.


I am in my car I hear my voice softly asking Him "what are you doing? Do you love me?" Now I am yelling -"What more must I go through to show you how much I love you? Take me I am ready. Why do I have to endure more medical treatments? You are my God. You alone can cure any of the ailments I have. I am tierd and weak. I know you are big enough to handle my disappointment Father.
I beg you Lord to give me rest."

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